LucaLorenzelli/iStockPhoto / Getty Images
Fr.
Tony’s Midweek Message
Alone
but not Lonely
April
15, 2020
Almighty God, whose Son had nowhere to lay his head: Grant
that those who live alone may not be lonely in their solitude, but that,
following in his steps, they may find fulfillment in loving you and their
neighbors; through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen. (BCP, 829)
Today marks the 4th week
since we began physical distancing and shelter-in-place here in Ashland; it
looks like at least another 4 weeks may be needed before we can begin to figure
out how restart our common life and economy.
The U.S. Department of Health and Human Service’s Substance Abuse and
Mental Health Administration (SAMHSA) has updated guidelines for getting
through a pandemic isolation and quarantine emotionally and mentally in one
piece. The whole thing can be read at https://store.samhsa.gov/sites/default/files/d7/priv/sma14-4894.pdf
SAMHSA says that we can anticipate certain
emotional responses to the stress of isolation:
anxiety or worry about our own health or those around you, fear about
not being able to care for those who depend on us, uncertainty, boredom and frustration
at not having things the way we want them, anger if you think you have been
exposed to illness through the negligence of others, rage at leadership’s
efforts to cope with the pandemic—whether too little or too much, too slow or
too fast. Depression is common among
those facing the stress of pandemic isolation; Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder,
while less common, also can be expected in a percentage of the population.
Understanding realistically the
risks involved is essential: public
perceptions in times like these tend to be either way overblown or too understated. Keep up to date, but do not overdo your
exposure to media coverage. Rely on
credible sources of information and pay particular heed to the announcements of
our state public health authorities.
Often in extended times of risk,
people can begin to overuse alcohol or drugs (prescribed or street) to “deal
with” the stress and depression. But
this only makes things worse, and can lead to real inability to cope with the
risks. Remember that alcohol is a
depressant: too much too regularly can only lead to greater and greater depression
and anxiety. Being cooped up with
another person can bring out the worst in our relationships. If you have a history of abuse in a family,
times like these often can bring relapse and tragedy.
In all of this, we need to face our
situation honestly. Ask yourself if you
have been drinking more since you’ve been in lock-down: more than before, or
more than you think you should. Remember
that one of the earliest signs of substance abuse is denial: saying to yourself and others that there is
no problem when every objective standard suggests there is. Have you felt rage? Have you been angry and controlling to those
with you? Or have you felt threatened in
your “shelter” because of the scary people you are sheltering with?
All of these are hard issues, but
have to be addressed head-on. If you feel
lonely or need support, call someone, whether your doctor, a family member elsewhere, friends,
or clergy at Trinity. All the mental
health, substance abuse, and domestic abuse hotlines remain open: you should
call these if you even fear that there may be a problem. Jackson County’s Help Line, a 24 hours a day
7 days a week crisis call center for mental health, substance abuse, and
domestic violence concerns is a good starting point: 541-779-4357. If you are depressed to the point of thinking
about ways of harming yourself, or fear that you may harm others, call immediately.
Just vegetating in front of the
Netflix screen, eating junk food and sugary drinks is a fail-safe way of feeding
depression. To overcome this, you must
intentionally, as a matter of decision, break out of your isolation (without violating
physical distancing rules).
Regularly and intentionally connecting
with others by phone or video-conference, letters, or even at a distance over a
fence, is a good start in overcoming the stress of isolation. Maintaining good health practices like
healthy food and regular exercise overcomes the blue demon much better than any
self-medication. Meditating, prayer,
and any of the contemplative practices we use at Trinity (like Lectio Divina or
Centering Prayer) will go a long way in restoring a sense of balance and
purpose. Getting busy on a task you have
wanted to do for a long time but never had the time for is a good way of
focusing your attention elsewhere. Maybe
take that online course you have wanted to take for years?
There is no reason to be lonely
while you are alone, or to let this virus kill you slowly without ever having
infected you. We want everyone stronger and healthier when
we come out of this, not the beaten down walking wounded.
Grace and peace.
Fr. Tony+
No comments:
Post a Comment