Beauty of Holiness
Fr. Tony’s Message for “Paw Prints”
The E-zine of St. Mark’s Episcopal Church, Medford, OR
August 5, 2022
As many of you know, I was raised in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, commonly referred to then as “Mormons.” Church in my youth was a very horizontal, not a vertical, affair: lay leadership, congregants teaching and preaching to each other. We did have a weekly “sacrament” (what we called Holy Communion): a 10-minute exercise with water in little paper cups and broken white bread that served as a short side show break in the main event, the “talks” we gave each other on gospel topics. There was no liturgical reading of scripture, set prayers or responses, usually only one musical “number” from a poorly rehearsed volunteer choir, and director-led gospel songs and hymns for opening, sacrament, and closing. Once a month, we had “fast and testimony” service where the prepared “talks” were replaced by open-mic sharing of personal faith stories.
When I was a sophomore in High School, our family was invited to attend the wedding of the daughter of one of my father’s business partners. He ran the office machines store in Wenatchee, Washington, while my father ran the one in Moses Lake, about 40 minutes away. My father’s partner was an Episcopalian, and the wedding was to be held at St. Luke’s in Wenatchee. It was the first time I attended a church service outside of Mormonism.
The evening service was lit by dozens of candles, set in multi-branched candelabra. The ministers wore exquisite vestments, shiny and colorful. The music was gorgeous, and the preaching well prepared by a professional trained in the subtleties of scriptural interpretation and theology. The bride wore a white lace dress with a 10-foot train; the groom was in white-tie. The church was filled with clouds of sweet-smelling incense that accented and at times obscured the blazing candles. The liturgy was chanted, and we all followed along in the Book of Common Prayer.
I was astounded. It was like nothing I had ever seen or experienced. Participating, I realized I finally understood the word “worship”: prayers, hymns, and beauty addressed to God, rather than teaching and admonition addressed to each other. On the ride home, I asked my parents why it was different from our weekly church fare. “Oh—the Episcopalians are like Catholics: they love stagecraft and scripted texts rather than the plain old Gospel.” But this seemed to me to miss the deep beauty of what had gone on, and from that Sunday on in LDS Church, I always was more solemn, more God-directed, and more attentive during “sacrament.” And I was increasingly aware of the poverty of the preaching and the lack of reverential “worship” in my Mormon ward.
I learned the great benefits of horizontal, people-to-people communal life in faith in the Church of my youth. For that, I will always be grateful. But by the time I was in college, I had become more and more hungry for worship and the “beauty of holiness.” This was fed somewhat by occasional attendance at Roman Catholic mass in graduate school, but by the time Elena and I were intentionally in “church-shopping” mode, we realized that many of the things we found repellant in Mormonism were also shared by the Roman Church, including an overbearing hierarchy, demands to let intellectual life be subsumed by the religious experience, and subordination of women.
When we first attended an Episcopal Church as adults open to changing churches, at All Saints Church in Chevy Chase, Maryland, we felt we had come home. This broad church parish had its own problems, to be sure, but the beauty of holiness was in every gathering, rightly called “worship services,” characterized by reverential prayers addressed to God in well thought-out and prepared words, intentional acts of worship including beauty appealing to all the senses, and well informed and responsible preaching. Even the hymns were better music and literature.
I am grateful I am an Episcopalian.
Grace and peace.
--Fr. Tony+
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